Sunday, May 17, 2009

Deep thought

hey bloggers!!! so this morning this glamor chic was definitely feeling down. i woke up @ about six something so i just turned my ipod on hoping to fall asleep again but i definitely didnt. i started looking over some features of my life. & of course one of them was:::

1)no boyfriend to call my own [lol]. so i have been single since january & i can not find a boy who fits my style or wat i really want in a guy. [except for one but he lives in NC which is like a thousand miles away lol] but im like wtf i think im being too picky but a girl shouldnt have to settle for less when she has the whole big world to explore.

Conclusion: so i was down pretty much all through church [mine you im the usher so im always suppose to be happy and greeting people] looking type miserably lol. so my stepdad treated me & my mom plus my auntie & her husband to some red lobster. shrimp always make me feel happy for some odd reason that helped alot [simple explanation ::: such a fat ass lol (excuse the language lol). then on the way home my mom & stepdad had a talk with me.

my mom explained to my stepdad how i think im better than half the chicken heads walking around paterson & he said he dont see anything wrong with that. he explains how im beautiful & that my smile & personality can brighten up any room. then im like thanks & blushing in the back seat & watever. [mine you im dark so it takes alot for me to actually blush lol] then im like i think im too picky wit guys thats y i cant find nobody. i want the perfect guy that doesnt exist. he starts explaining how he does exist somewhere in this world & how im waiting for him ::: he is waiting for me [thats actually put a smile on my face lol] i just have to be patient & apparently its not time for me to be in such a relationsip. that i also have to love myself before i can love somebody else. i have to think about my needs and goals. & when i do find this dude, he is gonna be working for the same high achieving goals as me [ definitely awesome lol].

so my thoughts are: im gonna be patient & wait for my dream guy cuz he does exist within this world. that i have to love myself first and always remember that.