Day 4 ~ Dear Siblings

hey loves!!! i have been kinda busy & work has been kicking my butt but im back lol so here i go .....

Dear Jamar & Naomi,
I love you guys. we may be thousands of miles away but i love you guys!!! lol we may have different moms & the same dead beat dad but you guys are still a part of me & will always be a part of my heart. jamar you have become the best dad with your son. you are showing him all the love our dad did not give to us. naomi you have become a beautiful young lady that reminds me of myself so much lol. i wish we lived closer so we could become much closer but hey things happen & people move away but thank God for cellphones & fb lol.

Dear Clarence,
my big lil bro!!! you do some crazy & stupid stuff sometimes but hey you are a part of my heart & i love you! i have lost you too many times to your stupid actions but i think you are finally on the right track. i just wish there was still another way b/c of all the trouble in the world right now but im still proud of you. you are a marine hoping to one day fight for our country. i just fear that i might lose you. i remember crying so hard when you left for training b/c i know you were in it for good. but i know God has you wrapped in his arms & i hope everything works out for your good.

peace, love, dance
tammy

The Veronicas: Leave Me Alone

hey loves!! i know i just blogged like a hour or so ago but im really feeling this song. its old but its describes how i felt once my last relationship ended. i use to always hear it in claires & now i found it again lol. the song is called "Leave Me Alone" by The Veronicas.

Day 3 ~ Dear Parents

Dear Mom,
you are my everything. you know almost everything about me. you know when im happy, when my skies are grey, or when i just need a bear hug. i think thats something i will always remember about you & that is your bear hugs lol. you have never left me like other people within my life & sometimes i believe you & God are the only people who will never turn their back on me. no matter wat stupid stuff i may do you will always be there beside me, correcting me, & telling me wat to look out for next time. You work so hard & never gave up. you were the mom & dad within my life. you made sure i received the best education & even now you continue to put up with the bs at your job so that i am able to attend MSU. now you are working to help me get a car b/c i deserve to be free & go as i please. you have never missed a show or a performance; you may not be the loud mom cheering me on but you were always the quiet one just sitting there watching & smiling. when i dance, i always picture your face & how proud you are of me. i know sometimes i let you down when i do stupid things regarding my life but you always stand by me. i couldnt ask for a more perfect mom. i wish i could give you the world but for now all i can give you is my heart & i just wanna to let you know that you are my world.

Dear Dad,
Thanks for missing every performance I ever was in. thanks for not attending one game i ever cheered at. thanks for forcing my mom to pay for my elementary school & college tuition b/c you decided you didnt want to take care of me. thanks for making me & my mom stronger & showing us we can provide for ourselves & we dont have to rely on a dude to provide for us. thanks for showing me that most guys within this world are worthless & are a younger version of you. thanks for the happy birthday calls but no money to help my mom out. thanks for everything ... thanks for nothing


peace, love, dance
tammy

Day 2 ~ Dear Crush

So i kinda fall behind due to troubling circumstances but in the end i know everythng is going to work out b/c im placing my situation into God's hands. so here is my letter ......

Dear crush,

o how i miss you lol. we havent talked or even chilled in so long but i guess i should have know it will never be anything but a crush. the summer is almost over & you going back to school & im still stuck here in wack paterson going to wack montclair lol. i have had the biggest crush on you since high school & i remember seeing you every morning wishing we would get over the crush stage but we never did i see. i dont crush on just anyone; you have to have something special & sweetie you are truly special lol. you are doing something wit your life, you are hard worker, you are book & street smarts, you are athletic & much more. who wouldnt crush on you lol. but hey you got your groupies at school so you got wat you need but i will always have the biggest crush on you & you already know it lol. love ya buddy!!!

peace, love, & dance
Tammy

Day 1 ~ Dear Best Friend

Dear Best Friend(s),

i love you guys!!!!!! jasmine & kiara you guys are my heart. you have been there for me since high school even though we have some dry areas lol. we have experienced about everything together like literally lol. sometimes we barely talk but we always make sure we meet up to party & have an awesome time. i remember we all became close in sign language where we use to get in trouble almost every day for talking of course. i remember being in african american assembly with jasmine & then prom with kiara. the car rides to montclair with jasmine every wednesday & much more. you guys are everything to me & you are willing to put up wit my crazy behind lol.

i use to have a best friend when i was younger but i see that didnt work out. o well the show goes on with or without you. i thought she was the co-star but instead she was an extra & everyone knows they are not really that important. im still shining even brighter than when were younger. You went away to school & forgot where your true friends were but hey you will learn eventually lol. i still love you tiara but i will never chase after you. if you are not God then you are not worth the chase.

i still believe that there is one more person out there that will be my ultimate best friend so this is to you. i cant wait till the day we meet & everything will be awesome & right. i love my besties but you will be there when they are not. you will probably be there more than them lol.

30 Days ~ 30 Letters

Day 1 — Your Best Friend
Day 2 — Your Crush
Day 3 — Your parents
Day 4 — Your sibling (or closest relative)
Day 5 — Your dreams
Day 6 — A stranger
Day 7 — Your Ex-boyfriend/girlfriend/love/crush
Day 8 — Your favorite internet friend
Day 9 — Someone you wish you could meet
Day 10 — Someone you don’t talk to as much as you’d like to
Day 11 — A Deceased person you wish you could talk to
Day 12 — The person you hate most/caused you a lot of pain
Day 13 — Someone you wish could forgive you
Day 14 — Someone you’ve drifted away from
Day 15 — The person you miss the most
Day 16 — Someone that’s not in your state/country
Day 17 — Someone from your childhood
Day 18 — The person that you wish you could be
Day 19 — Someone that pesters your mind—good or bad
Day 20 — The one that broke your heart the hardest
Day 21 — Someone you judged by their first impression
Day 22 — Someone you want to give a second chance to
Day 23 — The last person you kissed
Day 24 — The person that gave you your favorite memory
Day 25 — The person you know that is going through the worst of times
Day 26 — The last person you made a pinky promise to
Day 27 — The friendliest person you knew for only one day
Day 28 — Someone that changed your life
Day 29 — The person that you want tell everything to, but too afraid to
Day 30 — Your reflection in the mirror

So im going this challenge wit my buddy tasha & im kinda excited. it gives me a chance to really express how i feel about certain issues involving each topic.

Tired of being "IT" its time to "CATCH ME"

hey loves!!!! how are you?!?! life has been good lately [well kinda lol] work has been a headache like usual & my social life has been ok but of course there is always one dude to mess it up lol. gotta vent for a minute lol. so im feeling this dude & i have been feeling him for a long time but im think he is not feeling me the same way at all. i wish he would just come out & say it but of course he will not & i will continue to be lost.

im tired of running after him & in return he gives me his ass to kiss so at the end of the day im done chasing him. he got his life & i got my life & its better if they dont even clash. so im tired of chasing someone who i thought was actually worth the chase but at the end of the day you are a jerk just like the rest of them.

its hard to give up the chase when he is everything you want & more but this chic is tired of being "it" & is ready to have someone run after her. come caught me♥

New Dance Video

hey loves!!! got a new dance video to show everybody!! her name is luam & she makes the best hiphop dances on youtube. watch & enjoy♥

Discovering Myself

hey loves!!!!!!! long time no talk lol. my life has been ok. me & my friends are cool again. im talking & chillin with quite a few friends from school. my mom has been on her best behavior & not getting on my last nerves lol. work is crazy like usual but the good news is im on vacation this week!!!! & im enjoying every freakin second of it lol.

so after talking to my buddy tasha she help me to do a self analysis. so the pretty much obvious is that I am a smart, talented, within 2 yrs college graduate, caring, goofy as hell individual. she also mentioned pretty but sometimes i think differently about that subject regarding me lol. but i found my weakness or the evil part of me & thats jealous lmao. like i told tasha last night i am one jealous chic smh but the question that me & her have is "why is a person like me so freakin jealous when i have so much out there for me" im still trying to find an answer to this question about myself smh. but this jealous spirit that i have gotta go cuz it only hinders me & who wants to be with a jealous chic lol so i got something to work on over the summer lol.

peace ♥ love ♥ dance

Dance Obsession

hey loves!!! back again with some new dance obsessions!!!!! sooooo here they go!!!

Father's Day to me

hey loves!!! probably will be blogging all day cuz i have nothing else to do lol. so today is Father's Day which is the worst holiday within my life. my father is worthless in my eyes. he conceived me & thats about it. he left when i was in middle school & never came back to visit & he use to text me & stuff till i changed my number. we recently started texting & talking about he missed so much in my life already. he has missed dance shows, cheerleading competitions, games, church events, my first boyfriend & my last, 8th & 12th grade graduation, & just much more. as a child i would always blame myself for him leaving that I wasnt good enough to be his daughter but as i got older i realized that he was the one missing out on my life & all my achievements. im a senior in college with some much a head of me. i have been on the dean's list 3 out 6 times in college, im a dancer, im a teacher, people love me & would do anything to help me out, i gotta a big heart even for people that hurt me. what father wont be proud of me. so hey his lost. just praying the dude that i decide to settle with will be the opposite & choose to be in his children's life.

but i want to give a special shoutout to my mom for playing both roles within my life & just always being there for me. as i grow older we buttheads more but she is always there for me. love you mom!!!

Bitter and tired of caring!!!

hey my loves!!! sorry but i need to vent really bad.

So i thought my week was finally getting better but i guess not lmao. people are seriously getting on my nerves. everyone has pretty much turn their backs on me. my best friends could careless cuz we all were wrong in our argument but of course nobody ever wants to be wrong. yes i should have hit them up but yes they could have also hit me up. but hey they shouldnt have to "chase after me" lmao. i was only sick with a horrible cold but hey im still wrong lol. they always forget me. like im looking over our pics on fb & they have so many pics together but im barely in any but hey they are not leaving me out lol. i was always a third wheel & they agreed so quickly when i said i didnt wanna be bothered anymore lol i just find all this funny. next involves my ex lol this one is funny. he got mad cuz me & his cousin have regular day to day conversation but hey i cant have friends. im meant to lie my life alone with no outsie communication to anyone else. then i definitely told this dude how i felt but hey my feelings & emotions for him are trash lol. thats how im feeling right now like my thought for him is trash. my heart is trash. i cant even think of thing worth smiling for right now. i have so much hate in my heart for life. since saturday i have been praying to God to take this hate away cuz i dont like hating people. but if people wanna turn their backs on me then im definitely doing the same. im too tired to care & im throwing my heart away. im becoming heartless cuz its not like people care anyway. im about to delete my facebook, twitter, & change my number on my phone cuz thats just how freaking horrible i feel about everything. i swear i feel like just calling people up & cursing them out thats how mad & how much hate i have for people right now. i cant stop crying & i just want everything to end. im tired of crying over people that dont love me!!!! im tired of caring!!!! im just tired!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I'm Back!!! Another Day Another Drama

hey loves!!! long time since i have been on here & that b/c school, work, & church have been driving me crazy. my life keeps falling apart & coming back together but at this point its kinda falling apart lol.

Friday was just a crazy day at work. by the end of the day i had concluded soon it will be time to move out of paterson b/c its getting to crazy. work was horrible but my loser & my baby catherine put a smile on my face. then i found something out friday night & it kinda got me confessed & also sending me a crazy track lol.

Saturday i was sick all day but i had church. then the besties forgot me which ran into today & everything just blow up. so i have no more bffs which i think is very amusing in a way but its watever cuz im not beat for nobody. the funny thing is that i admitted i was wrong in a way but apparently they werent wrong as well which is a lie. they feel they shouldnt have to "chase" after me lmao wow like for real chics. im too good for this right now & there will be others & i will live just fine without them.

so my conclusion at the end of the horrible weekend is ...........
*friends come & go just like seasons
*never share your emotions or feelings with people cuz its worthless
*never cry over anyone cuz most likely they are not worth it

Ke$ha = new addiction

hey my loves!!! new addiction lol!!! well its not technically new but im in love this chic lol. she goes by the name of Ke$ha is she is amazing lol. two songs im currently loving is Blah Blah Blah [ft. 3OH!3] & Take It Off. so here they go ...............


Blah Blah Blah


Take It Off

Video of the Year

Video of the Year goes to .... :::drum roll::: Lady Gaga ft. Beyonce: Telephone. type weird but awesome. if jail was only like this lol

Twitter!!!

hey my loves!!!! long time no see!!! lol well i decided to get a new twitter being that i erased my old one. i need followers all over again so plez add me!!!!! lol

http://twitter.com/msglam414

Happy Valentine's Day

hey my loves!! Happy Valentine's day [even though i truly hate it lol]. So i found a new song that I can relate to & it can definitely go wit V-Day. Its called Gravity & its by Sara Bareilles. I found it on youtube when a young lady was dancing to it [which I probably will post later.] This song describes how I feel wit my ex. He got my falling into his gravity which im having a hard time getting away from. Gravity is the strongest force on our planet & i doubt i got the strength to pull away :::sigh:::

new song new addictions lol

hey my loves!!!! life is good a cant complain. i mean i could but no ones listening [aly & aj: like whoa]. so life has been the norm [school, work, church, etc] so of course i have some new addictions & they are fabulous & glamorous Lady Gaga & Ke$ha. First up is Lady Gaga with Telephone ft. the sexy Beyonce. Then there is Ke$ha with Blah Blah Blah ft 3OH!3. so here they go ..........


so not the official video but just listen to it lol

Sailor Moon AMV

hey my loves!!! found another Sailor Moon Amv lol. so this one is called Love Song Requiem by Trading Yesterday. It kinda sad but the images in the video are awesome. So here is the video with some lovely pics following after.

Mary J Blige: Sorry Seems to be the Hardest Word

hey my loves!!!! old song that have found on a sailor moon amv while surfng youtube. it is mary j blige & the song is called "Sorry Seems to be the Hardest Word". i guess i can really relate to this in some way with my ex or watever so this song really hits home.

Hey My Loves

whoaaaa!!!!! hey my loves!!!! idk the last time i was on here lol. life is good a cant complain i mean i could but no ones listening lol [aly & aj: like whoa] so lately my life has been centered around school, work, church, & dance lol. im schedule is non-stop throughout the week [well except for wednesday where i have no class]. im still single. im still goofy. & most of all im still glamorous lol. before school started life was kinda crazy with some crazy weekend hotel nites with the besties that im trying to forget that something actually happen [may i add never again!!!! lol]. so thats it for now i guess lol. i will definitely be back with more stuff so bye my loves!!! stay glamorous!!!